ARE YOU TAKING YOUR MEDS?

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I was the kid whose mom had to come pick her up from sleepovers. I was the kid at sleep away camp who spent as much time crying as I did making ashtrays. The first semester of boarding school my cousin was “the cousin of the girl who cries all the time”. If they gave out awards for the mastery of homesickness I would get the gold. So, last summer when a dear friend of mine was suffering from severe homesickness due to difficult circumstances beyond her control. I could totally relate. As she was too far away to hug all I could think to do was write what I hoped would be an uplifting and reassuring email. She swears it helped, and later when she was safely and happily home she suggested that I turn that letter into a blog. In the interests of privacy, I have not used her real name and have made some very minor edits.
 

Dearest Miserabella,

First things first, are you taking your medication?

 Secondly, EVERYTHING you are feeling is reasonable and sane. ANYONE in your situation would be feeling the same things. Maybe, rather than spending time around people who seem to “have it all”, you should try to find people who have less and help them. I know this sounds “Pollyannaish”, but how about volunteering for something? Go help feed people at a homeless shelter or a food bank. Find a way and a reason to “be” while you wait out this difficult period. Keep exercising and crying. Listen to music that makes you want to dance. Go out and get some novels/books by Catherine Ryan Hyde. In Tanzania I read “Take me with you” and LOVED it. “Becoming Chloe” is wonderful too. “Jumpstart the world” Is WOW; I’ve read six more of her books in the past three weeks. Get a journal. Write in it everyday. If nothing else you will find it afascinating read years from now. Go to the Humane Society and offer to walk the dogs. Look at yourself in the mirror. I mean REALLY look. Into your eyes not your face. Like you would a child you are desperate to reach. Tell yourself, out loud if possible, that you’re gonna be okay. Watch John Stewart, John Oliver or some other daily/ nightly program you can look forward to everyday that makes you think and laugh. Starting no earlier than 8pm, binge on downloadable TV shows. I highly recommend “Homeland” and “Damages” and “Newsroom”. Take a shower EVERYDAY (If not for your sake then for everybody else’s) Create a routine for yourself with little, possibly silly things you can look forward to like a morning frappuccino, the horoscope/crossword in the local paper, a bit of chocolate after lunch, and a peek at “What’s New” on net-a-porter. Call/Skype me whenever you want/need. Go for a walks!!! Become an amateur photographer and capture moments of crazy, strange, funny and interesting people/things. Decide to learn all about something online whether it be political, charitable, or technical. Put yourself in charge of cooking dinner. Find complicated recipesand try them. Learn to knit (very therapeutic) and make me a sweater. Don’t stay up too late and sleep AT LEAST 8 hours at night. If you nap limit it to 2 hours.

These are all EXTREMELY helpful in times like these and require very little commitment while at the same time being thoroughly consuming. Remember that a few years from now this will seem just a moment in the story of your life . You will look back on it and feel strong. You will learn a lot that will help you the next time life puts a bump in your road. I PROMISE!!!!!!!!

I love you and know that you, especially YOU can TOTALLY do this. XXXXXXXXXXXX

Me

Article By Anna Quick-Palmer

 

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